Hi, I was in your situation back in the late 90's. The only difference is I never met my father. how I learned about him was through a letter from my step father to my mother after they divorced. I was 12 at that time. I always thought my step-father was my my real dad. I was then told that my real father died in the Korean War. All throught high school and my early adult years that news kept haunting me. I felt in my gut that this story was not true. I started asking more questions and I was always given a negative answer. I gave up at that time. To make a long story short I did find my father after 47 yrs. He lived in Alaska, and he was in the Korean War, and he was wounded and ended up with two purple hearts, but he was alive! I contacted the schools he went to, and there I learned about his family and where they lived. I looked up Social Security Death Index to see if he was alive or dead. Through this I found my grandfather and benefits were going to my grandmother. So I learned my father was not dead and my grandfather was. I wasn't having any luck with the military, because I didn't have enough information at that time. These are just a few suggestions. I did meet my father in 1996 one day before my deadline to actually give up. Because of my perseverance I found out the truth and my father. It will take some time to do research etc., but don't give up and don't listen to any negative remarks. Always keep a positive attitude you will find your answers.
God has a plan in our lives and he lets things happen when the time is right. Keep your faith and pray for God to guide you through this. Just remember this and I want you to prepare yourself, when you do find your father you have to be aware that he may reject you. He may not want to be found,he may have another family who knows nothing about you. This does happen and I hope it won't happen to you. You have to be very careful in how you approach this matter after you find him. You don't want to scare him away. If you want you can e-mail me at email@example.com
and we can talk more about this. Good Luck