I have just been researching this area.
Richard Cole is my 2nd greatgrandfather. I have now verified that his first wife was Catherine Rutter (1810-1842), who was born in Adolphustown, Ontario. She was the daughter on UEL John George Rutter who was originally from Germany. He was only in the U.S. for a short period of time before he had to leave and come to Canada. He actually was in the same expedition as my ancestors from New York City to Sorel Quebec and then on to the Bay of Quinte.
Catharine and Richard arrived in the Brighton area (Northumberland Co), in 1831, soon after they married. The Cole family is of Dutch descent and you can see more info on my Ancestry tree named 'Cole Family Tree". I grew up quite close to that homestead, which has now been bought by another family who demolished the old house. But I still have an image in my head of the house since Richard's two children, Zoa and Grant lived the rest of their lives there and neither ever married.
We still have the front gate from Richard's homestead. I am not sure what caused Catherine's death.
Last August was the 127th annual consecutive Cole Picnic which was held in Codrington, Ontario. All of those present are descendants of Richard and his second wife Henrietta.
Our family has not had much contact with Catherine's children, but I am sure that they are interested what happened to them and their descendants.
Hope that this helps
I would love more info on Catherine's children since there seems to be a gap in my information.