Anna Marie:
You touched my heart.
Like the words of a song I can never forget.
You touched my soul.
Like the smell of the air,
The first day of spring.
When you held me close…
I felt safe.
I wonder in my heart.
I wonder what I could do.
I wanted to love you.
You touched my heart
with your loving kindness.
Thank you for giving me life.
I heard music in the air.
Was it your voice?
I dreamed of you rocking me in the chair.
You were crying.
I am OK.
I am safe.
I have been loved deeply.
I feel your beauty in the rain.
I feel you with every step I make.
Please rest in peace now.
Two hearts separated.
Souls forever connected
because you touched my heart.

Note to My First Mother: I have finally found you. I said my prayers in heartfelt agony at your grave. I feel as if I had lost you twice. They tell me you died of Breast Cancer in 1987. I am sorry for not being able to find you sooner. I just didn't know how to find you. Now all of these years gone by and I feel an empty space in my heart without you. My adoptive Mom told me that you left contact information for me, yet at the time of adoption- they didn't want further contact. I wish they had thought of how I'd be feeling now. Why didn't the adoption agency give it to me when I asked for confidentiality releases back in 1981? Who were they protecting anyway? I guess we got lost in an adoption paper trail. I know that you have been with me all of these years in spirit. Even though, I was never able to hold your hand or look into your eyes. I know that you have been watching over me. Please rest now. I feel that I am home again. I love you. Thank you for loving me and blessing me with a wonderful life full of love.


I am currently seeking information on my possible first father known by my first mother's friends as Tommy Yates. Who may have moved to California in 1962. I am hoping to find him alive and well. I would like to receive my medical information, if no reunion possible. Or maybe validation that he is indeed my biological father and or not. Please, even if given anonymously. As a hospice nurse, I worry about this sort of "lack" of information for my health as well as my children's. I will tell ya, not knowing your medical information can be life threatening and it is something everyone who doesn't know should be concerned about. And those who do know their medical history, be thankful for.

Please help adult adoptee's receive the rights of any other American Citizen. Their original birth certificates and updated medical information, if possible. Thanks for visiting and it is my hope that if you don't know, you find out. Because even though I found the mother that loved me first gone, and experienced a heart breaking experience at the end of a 23 year search I wouldn't have traded knowing who she was and some of my story for anything. I now know who I look like. As well as possibly know why I get that need for jumping out of perfectly good airplanes with just a parachute from time to time. And most of all, why I may have dedicated my life to helping others in fighting disease as well as helping those whose lives are cut short because of disease find hopeful peace at the end of their own journey. Maybe her struggle, if even in spirit guided me and supports me to this very day.

Please help me find my birthfather/birthsiblings. Before I am once again too late.

Birthfather if you happen to read this guide, please find it in your heart to give your daughter what she needs to find peace and or closure in her life's journey to know her truth. Whatever the reason, whatever the choice for adoption at the time, does not reflect upon who I have become with the help of my loving parents. My first family cannot replace nor define who I have always known as Mom and Dad. One does not replace the other. It only defines the soul that is searching for their beginnings.

Again, medical information requested, even if anonymous. For instance: BRCA-1 and BRCA-2 are autosomal dominant genes inherited in breast cancer, ovarian cancer, prostate cancer, colon cancer, and pancreatic cancer. Pathology records are used to confirm family history of cancer because they are highly reliable. Adoptee's are unable to have full assesssments of genetic pedigree including three-generation history, primary site, age at diagnosis of genetic relatives, previous surgeries that were successful/unsuccessful or reduction of risk, pregnancy loss, birth defects, race, ethnicity, health problems in family history. We are at a loss to be medically evaluated by genetic predisposition, whereby our environmental and occupational exposure/risks cannot be assessed in completion.

46 chromosomes, 23 pairs, make up the human body. Anna Marie and Unknown father ? Tommy Yates gave me such chromosomes. What are my risks? After 23 years, I finally know my mothers medical history. She suffered with breast cancer for 10 years. Died at the age of only 47 years old. I found her when I was 43 years old. Diagnostic testing for breast cancer is not recommended by medical professionals until the age of 40. Therefore, the risks are even higher for not knowing about being in a higher risk group and taking steps for early monitoring and detection.

Tommy, please help me fill in my medical history. As a mother, I mainly worry about my beautiful children. Today, most adoptive parents as well as birthmothers/birthfathers opt for open adoption because of the necessity of medical knowledge and prevention today. Additionally, no mother decides to go full term with her pregnancy and just forgets. Most worry, usually a quiet desparation of concern about the child they relinquished, more than likely- for a better life than one they could have provided themselves at the time.

Please open your heart (s). And let your biological child know the most basic of biological heritary knowledge. If no reunion desired.
Thank you for understanding.
jrussole