Have you checked the national military retired record office in St Louis, MO for a hard copy of your father's military 201 records jacket and all enclosed documents. Also, check with the Department of Veteran Affairs. Have his service serial number, SSN, period of service, rank/grade, Military Occupational Speciality (MOS), assigned unit, dates of birth/death, and dependents names. Get his birth and death certifications, social security application, driver's license (application),and home mortgage application or lease agreement. These documents may give vital names, places, dates, and decendent SSNs that prove valuable in tracing the people you seek through google, intelius, and a host of other search engine.
P.S. Look for living male sibling or decendants of females that may have changed their names and addresses. Get their phone number and call.